Travels: A Play in Two Acts
(Fred and Jarred are talking near the fence that separates their properties.)
Jarred: Tom’s supposed to come by today. You all expecting anything?
Fred: Abby is waiting for some ribbon so she can finish Miss Anna’s wedding dress. Miss Anna is getting married tomorrow! I hope Tom makes it through all this mud.
Jarred: Yeah, rain’s been so bad this spring that the frogs are drowning.
Fred: Didn’t Tom say he was going to buy an automobile? He oughta have fun trying to get through the mud and potholes.
Jarred: Why in the world would a fella want an automobile, for goodness sake? They’re noisy. Putt, putt, putt, BANG. They make stinky smoke. Flat tires - you don’t get flat tires on a horse.
Fred: Don’t think much of automobiles, do you, Jarred?
Jarred: Nope, there’s no future in ‘em. Give me a good horse and wagon anytime. The animals are gonna go nuts. All we need is a bunch of crazy bulls bashing down the fences. Can you imagine driving an automobile when you go out courtin’? Women would run away from you.
Fred: I hope Tom gets here soon. Abby is really fretting. (Fred notices Abby approaching.) Yup! Here she comes now.
(Abby enters stage right and runs to Fred.)
Abby: (anxiously) Fred, have you seen Tom? I don’t know what I’ll do if he doesn’t get here.
Fred: It’s all right, Abby. He’ll be here soon.
Abby: That’s easy for you to say, Fred. You don’t have to do all that sewing.
Fred: Well, if push comes to shove, I think I can help sew on ribbons.
(There’s a cloud of smoke and a putt, putt, putt, BANG in the distance.)
Abby: What in the dickens is that, Fred?
Fred: (laughing) That would be Tom, I reckon. Better get out of the road.
(Fred, Jarred, and Abby stare in wonder as Tom drives up to them.)
Tom: Howdy, howdy. (Tom turns off the car and jumps out.) Beautiful day for a ride in a Model T. How’re you all doing?
Abby: We’re sure glad to see you, Tom. You got my ribbon?
Tom: (Tom reaches into the car, pulls out a box, and hands it to Abby.) Right here, young lady.
Abby: (obviously relieved) Oh, thank you, Tom. I’ll get those ribbons sewn on right now. Nice automobile!
Fred: If you don’t mind, Tom, I’ll leave you to visit with Jarred. I need to get the horse and wagon ready so I can take Abby to Miss Anna’s. Nice automobile!
Tom: You go right ahead, Fred. Jarred and I have a lot to talk about.
(Fred exits left to the barn.)
Jarred: See you got one of those new-fangled motorcars, Tom?
Tom: I did. (gesturing to the car) You want a ride, Jarred?
Jarred: No way. Not on your life. I wouldn’t ride in that thing for love nor money.
Tom: How about just sitting in it? I won’t drive; I promise. I won’t even start it up.
Jarred: (reluctantly) Well . . . I guess it won’t hurt to sit in it -- just for a bit, mind you.
(Tom sits in the driver’s seat and motions for Jarred to get into the car. He enters.)
Jarred: So when did you get this thing, Tom?
Tom: A couple of months ago. I’ve wanted an automobile for a long time, but they were too expensive. Then after Henry Ford figured out how to mass-produce them, the prices dropped way down.
Jarred: What are those three things on the floor for?
Tom: They’re pedals for operating the automobile. Takes a bit of fancy footwork, I’ll tell you.
Jarred: Just out of curiosity, of course, how do you start this thing?
Tom: The first thing you have to do is put these blocks in front of the wheels.
(Tom removes the blocks from behind the seat and puts them in front of the wheels. He stays at the front of the car as Fred drives up in his wagon.)
Jarred: Why do you have to do that?
Tom: The car has a tendency to jump forward when you start it. The blocks stop that.
Jarred: I had a horse that tended to buck whenever I got on it.
(Fred reaches them in his wagon.)
Tom: Hey, Fred. How’s it going?
Fred: Just waiting for Abby to finish up. Then we’re heading over to Miss Anna’s.
(Abby walks up with the wedding dress wrapped in a sheet. Fred jumps down from the wagon and takes the dress from her. He lays it in the back of the wagon and then helps Abby into the wagon.)
Abby: I can’t thank you enough for the beautiful ribbons, Tom. Guess we’d better be going, Fred.
(Fred starts slowly down the road. He hits a pothole in the road and breaks a rear axle. The wagon tips to the side and Abby tumbles out.)
Abby: The dress! The dress! Is the dress all right? (Abby scrambles up and runs to the back of the wagon. She grabs the dress and holds it tightly. Tom and Jarred jump out of the car and run over to the wagon.)
Fred: Oh, my. What are we going to do now?
Tom: May I suggest the automobile? We can get it to Miss Anna’s in no time flat.
Fred: Don’t see that we have any other choice, Abby.
(Tom goes back to the car and starts it up.)
Jarred: You know, Abby, I could go with Tom and hold the dress -- keep it safe and clean. I mean, I wouldn’t normally ride in a car, Abby, but for you, I’d do anything.
Abby: (smiling) Why, Jarred, that’s the sweetest thing. I’d be honored if you’d do that.
(Tom drives up and Jarred gets in. Abby hands him the dress and closes the door.)
Abby: You all be careful now, you hear?
(Abby and Fred stand with their arms around each other as Tom and Jarred drive off.)