This part is designed to take you through the process of revising your essays, in a thoughtful, step-by-step manner.
Copy and paste Your Introuduction below.
Is your thesis at the end of the paragraph?
Is your theses clearly stated?
Is your thesis expository?
Is your lead engaging?
Do you start broadly?
Do you lead into your thesis in a logical manner?
What revisions do you need to make?
Copy and Paste Your Body Paragraphs Below
Are your topic sentences in the correct location?
Are your topic sentences clearly stated?
Are your topic sentences expository?
Are your topic sentences focused on the thesis?
Is the body of each paagraph focused on developing its topic sentence?
Are your points organized in a logical manner that fits the assignment?
Are your concluding sentences clearly stated?
Are your concluding sentences focused on the topic sentence?
Does your paragraph "sound" finished?
Are your points fully developed? Are there places where you cn add more details or offer further explanation? Look for places where you could do so.
What revisions do you need to make?
Paste your concluding paragraph below.
Did you restate your thesis at the begining of the paragraph?
Did you find a way to make your point with different wording?
Did you end in a broad way?
Did you answer "so what"? Did you leave your reader with reasons why your essay is significant?
What changes do you need to make?
Do you have 12 pieces of evidence in your essay? This means you will have to use two different sources for one of your topics. Here is an example: Indeed.com states the average salary is $43,000 a year (airline pilots). However, monster.com states the average salary is $67,000 a year (Alaska Air).
Your essay has one commentary (elaboration) per your two concrete details (evidence).
Does all paraphrased info support the points that you are making in the essay?
Is the information in your own words and voice?
Do you reference the source of your information in the text of your essay?
Have you included in-text citations where necessary?
Do all of your entries have the required information?
Is all the information presented in the proper format?
Are you entries in alphabetical order?
What revisions do you need to make with MLA formatting and Citations?
Can you replace words like am, is, was, were, are, been with stronger verbs? For example: This essay is used by students, becomes students realize that...
Re-read uyour your essay and pay careful attention to your verbs, which one's need to be stronger?
When using evidence, have you over-used words like "says" "stated" "claims..." etc.
Do you have any unnecessary or overused words/phrases, like "in my opinion," "This shows that," "For example," "To begin..." etc?
Do you have any unnecessary that, which or who phrases/clauses?
Have you avoided it and there at the beginning of sentences?
Are you telling or showing?
Have you used specific details?
Have you used the best words for the sentence?
What revisions do you need to make to your essay?
Varied Openings: Nothing deadens an essay more than one with sentences that all start the same. For example, some writers always start with a subject and a verb; others over use introductory phrases. Read over your draft to see if yuou have varied the way you start your sentences?
Varied Sentence Lengths: Too many short sentences make writing choppy. Too many long, flowing ones make it hard to read. A good balance of short, medium, and log sentences create an essay that flows beautifully. Read over your draft and see if you have variety in the length of your sentences.
What revisions do you need to make to your sentences?
Reread -read each paragraph. As you do, note places where your ideas need better connections.
Look at each transition. Have you made the most effective choice?
What changes do you need to make to your essay?
Think about the spelling errors that you typiclly make. Carefully read over the essay to ensure there are none of those errors.
Take a moment to think about the grammatical errors that you typically make. Read over your essay to ensure that you have not made any of those errors.
What changes do you need to make to your essay?
Introduction and Thesis Statement Score:
Body Paragraphs Score
Attached the link to your document below. You need to share your final draft with me.
In addition to sharing the link to your final draft, attach a copy of your essay here.
Conclusion Score
Organization and Structure Score
Transition Score
Conventions Score
In-Text Citations Score
Works Cited Score