Q28 - From Collecting to Designing: The Story of Pokémon (Revising)

Last updated 9 months ago
11 questions
Note from the author:

6.10C - The student is expected to revise drafts for clarity, development, organization, style, word choice, and sentence variety.

  • Students should review their drafts and identify places where the ideas are expressed in an unclear or illogical way. Students should make necessary changes by adding information to clarify meaning, deleting extraneous information that obscures meaning, combining ideas to avoid redundancies, and rearranging the ideas to ensure logical progression.

6.10C - The student is expected to revise drafts for clarity, development, organization, style, word choice, and sentence variety.

  • Students should review their drafts and identify places where the ideas are expressed in an unclear or illogical way. Students should make necessary changes by adding information to clarify meaning, deleting extraneous information that obscures meaning, combining ideas to avoid redundancies, and rearranging the ideas to ensure logical progression.
1

Which answer did you pick for question 28?

28. What is the MOST effective way to revise sentence 2?

1

Why did you chose that answer?

Test Taking Tips

This question is asking you to MOVE words around in a sentence so that the ideas in the sentence are clear.

Misplaced Modifiers & Active vs. Passive Voice

This question requires you to understand how to construct a strong, clear sentence.
  • The modifiers - words or phrases that describe another word in the sentence - are placed so that it is clear which word the writer is describing.
  • Strong sentences are written in the active voice meaning the subject of the sentence performs the verb on the object of the sentence.

First, think about the ideas and modifiers contained in the sentence:
  • as a video game designer
  • concept for Pokémon
  • was developed
  • by Satoshi Tajiri
  • during his early years
1

Which two phrases in this sentence are modifiers?

As a video game designer, the concept for Pokémon was developed by Satoshi Tajiri during his early years.
1
What would be a better order for this sentence?

___________________________ ______________________________ ____________________________ ________________________________________ .
Other Answer Choices:
as a video game designer,
by Satoshi Tajiri
the concept for Pokémon
during his early years
was developed

That's a good start. Now let's analyze the sentence to see if we can make it stronger by changing it to an active voice sentence.

1

Which word or phrase does the phrase "during his early years" seem to modify?

As a video game designer, the concept for Pokémon was developed by Satoshi Tajiri during his early years.
1

What is the verb (action) in this sentence?

As a video game designer, the concept for Pokémon was developed by Satoshi Tajiri during his early years.
1

What is the subject in this sentence?

As a video game designer, the concept for Pokémon was developed by Satoshi Tajiri during his early years.
1

Does the subject perform the verb in this sentence?

1
Drag the words into the correct order to make this an active voice sentence.___________________ ______________ ____________________________ .
Other Answer Choices:
developed
by
was
the concept for Pokémon
Satoshi Tajiri

Final Test Taking Tips

  • Use the process of elimination.
  • If you are stuck, count how many words are in the original sentence and in each of the answer choices. As a general rule, the correct answer choice will have fewer words than the original and most of the other answer choices.
1

Which answer should you have chosen for question 28?

28. What is the MOST effective way to revise sentence 2?

1

What will you do differently next time?

After you submit, read the answer choice explanations. In your Writing Journal, write down why the answer choice you originally chose was wrong, and why the correct answer is right.